


your soft touch (let me revel in it)

by syches



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff with a Sad Ending, Post-Canon, Romance, Sad Ending, anyway enjoy this 5k worth of fluff with a punch in the face at the end, is that not a tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:41:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26461351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syches/pseuds/syches
Summary: “Hey Suki?” he says, breaking the silence. She hums questioningly in reply. “I was thinking. About. Stuff.”She peeks up at him. “Okay? What kinda stuff?”“Well… watching Katara and Aang and Mai and Zuko and even Toph… I realized I kinda want that.”She sits up, facing him, and stares at him. “What?”“Y’know, kids. A family. The two of us.”Or: Sokka and Suki, throughout the years.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sokka/Suki (Avatar)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 66





	your soft touch (let me revel in it)

**Author's Note:**

> enjoy this 5k worth of fluff with a little bit of angst at the end!! sukka is underrated, so here i am. with sukka. (i know i should probably update my other fic but i've lost motivation. i'm sorry)

Sokka is having trouble sleeping. It’s not the first time, but it has been a long time since he’d not been able to sleep. He doesn’t get _why_ , everything’s fine (or as fine as it can be in the middle of a war) so he really shouldn’t be worried.

But he is. He’s worried about his dad, about how soon Aang can learn firebending, about _everything_. He just wants all this to be _over_. 

He sits up in the dark room, gazing at the pile of sleeping bodies around him. They’d given up on sleeping in different rooms a while ago since they came to Ember Island, and now they all sleep in the same room. It helps everyone (and though Toph would never admit it, Sokka knows it helps her too.)

He stands up and walks as quietly as he can outside. As soon as he steps foot outside the house, he notices it’s a full moon night. _Of course_. 

He heads down to the beach. The moon ( _Yue_ , his mind whispers) shines down on the sand, illuminating it in a warm glow. It’s a cool night, and Sokka finds he likes it. He sits down on a large piece of rock and gazes up at the sky. 

He misses her. Oh god, he misses her. _It isn’t fair_ , he thinks, _that she had to sacrifice herself for us_. _I should’ve saved her._

Logically, he knows it’s not his fault. Yue made her choice. It was her decision, and yet. And yet he can’t seem to stop blaming himself. 

He hears approaching footsteps and turns around to find Suki walking towards him.

“What are you doing up so late?” she asks, sitting down beside him.

“I couldn’t sleep,” he confesses quietly. “I don’t know why, I just…” He looks down and wrings his hands in his lap agitatedly. “I’m just so stressed. The comet’s coming soon, and Aang is just a kid, _how_ is he going to defeat Ozai… I just. I don’t know, I want all this to be _over_.”

Suki reaches out her hands and gently holds his in between hers, rubbing soothing circles into the back of his hand. 

“I know,” she says in a grave voice, the kind of voice someone their age should never have. “It’s terrible, but that’s why we’re here.” She looks at him and smiles, and Sokka feels like he’s falling in love with her all over again. “We’re going to put an end to this. Aang will. We’re all kids and in a way, it’s messed up, but we’re the only chance the world has.”

He nods and looks up again. The moon, if possible, is shining brighter now, and Sokka smiles up at it. He won’t let Yue’s sacrifice be in vain. 

They’re both quiet for a while until Suki leans into him and says, “You miss her, don’t you?”

Sokka swallows. “Yeah,” he replies quietly. He’s not so sure how Suki feels about Yue, but he hopes it’s good. “I do miss her. But I have you now.”

She turns to look at him and grins. “Yep,” she says, “but don’t you dare forget her.”

He kisses her softly. “Never.”

She puts her arms around him and kisses him back, and under Yue’s light, Sokka feels lighter than he has in ages.

(Of course nothing’s okay right now, but having Suki with him makes it feel better slightly.)

* * *

Sokka is sitting in his room that Zuko provided for him in the Fire Nation palace when Suki knocks.

It’s only been a week since the war ended, and he’s been forced by Katara to stay while his leg heals. And after that’s done, he’s going to be packing off straight to the South Pole. God, it’s been so long since he was home.

“Come in,” Sokka says, and Suki walks in. A warm feeling fills his chest, and he smiles at her. She’s dressed in her Kyoshi warrior uniform, make-up still on.

“Hey,” she says softly, sitting down beside him.

“Hey,” he echoes. “Why are you still in your uniform? It’s late.”

She shrugs. “Didn’t feel like removing it. How’s your leg?”

Sokka gently rubs said leg, frowning. “Katara’s been giving daily healing sessions, so it shouldn’t be too long now.”

Suki nods and moves closer so that she’s sitting between his legs, her head on his chest.

“Remember when I had you dress up in a Kyoshi warrior uniform?” she asks.

“How could I forget?” Sokka says, laughing. “You dressed me up in that heavy thing and taught me to fight.”

“You looked pretty good, in my opinion,” Suki replies, turning to look at him. “I kinda miss how you looked in it.”

Sokka frowns. “What are you saying?”

“I’m _saying_ ,” she says, “how about doing it again? Make-up, and everything.”

“But my leg isn’t healed,” Sokka replies. “I can’t fight.”

“We don’t have to fight. Just wear the uniform.”

Sokka thinks about it. It would be nice, he realizes. Wearing the uniform and learning about Suki’s home. They know too little about each other, and he wants to _know_. 

“Alright,” he says. “Let’s do it.”

Suki beams at him and holds out a hand, helping him up. His leg doesn’t hurt much anymore, but it’s nice to get help every once in a while. 

“Let’s go to the training room Zuko uses, no one’s gonna be there right now,” Suki says, and Sokka nods, following her down the winding passages and hallways. Their hands are still entwined, and Sokka finds he doesn’t want to let go. Suki’s hand is soft in some places and hardened in others, from years of wielding the Kyoshi Warriors’ fans. 

“I thought you said we weren’t gonna train?” He says, raising an eyebrow. Suki turns around and grins, eyes twinkling mischievously. 

“I think you can handle a few things,” she says, and Sokka can’t argue. 

They turn another corner and find themselves in front of the training room doors. “Go in,” Suki says. “I’ll go get the uniform for you.”

Sokka pushes the door open and walks in. He’s been here before, mostly to watch Suki spar (usually with Ty Lee, but Zuko offered the occasional practices as well). But he’s always on the _watching_ side, never on the actual fighting, thanks to his leg.

Oh, he cannot wait to spar Suki again.

He’d probably get his ass handed to him. But oh well. It’s Suki, so he doesn’t mind. 

She returns with the uniform a few minutes later, and helps him change into them. “C’mon,” she says. She hands him the fans and he feels the weight of them in his hands, strange and familiar all at once. The realization that he missed it surprises him. 

Suki holds up her fan, smirking at him. “Come on, pretty boy,” she says challengingly, “show me what you got.”

Normally, Sokka would wait for the other person to attack first and then gouge their weaknesses, but this is Suki. She _knows_ him. 

He jabs the fan at her left side, but she blocks him easily, and pulls his other arm behind him, forcing him to stare at the floor as she locks him in place. All in a matter of _seconds_. 

“Whew,” he pants out. “I miss my sword. Could’ve taken you with it.”

“Are you saying your sword is better than my fans?” she asks, letting go of him and helping him up. 

“I’m saying it works better for me,” he replies, dusting himself off. “Wanna go again?”

Oh, of course she does. 

Sparring Suki feels _amazing_. There’s always the thrill of not knowing what she’ll do next — and the way she’s able to improvise when he’s got an advantage. It’s exhilarating. 

Through jabs and punches and strikes, the sun starts to go down. It’s completely dark when Suki slides down against the wall, breathing heavily.

“Well,” she says, “that was fun.”

“Sure was,” Sokka replies. “It’s amazing, getting to do this after so long.”

“I know.” She looks at him and he’s drawn in by the intense look on her face. “Sparring you always seemed so… different than sparring anyone else.”

She leans in and presses a kiss to his cheek. He pecks her forehead in return. 

“Well, we should get changed,” Suki says, grimacing down at herself. “We’re sweaty and gross.”

Sokka laughs and gets up, holding out a hand to help Suki up. “Do you think Zuko would mind if we stole his favourite spot for a while?” 

“Knowing him, he’s probably there with Mai right now.”

“Hmm. You’re right. We’ll just get the largest balcony in the palace, then.”

She laughs and boops his nose. “That’ll probably be in the Fire Lord’s room, silly.”

Sokka pouts. “ _Fine_. We’ll try and find a secluded corner in the gardens. Being in the Fire Nation palace has some perks, at least.”

She chuckles and together they walk back the way they came from, hands intertwined. When they reach his door, she leans up and kisses him gently. “See you in the gardens, then,” she whispers, and leaves for him to change. He watches her go, intense and fierce but also soft and loving.

He is so hopelessly in love.

* * *

Sokka stares at the various parchments littered across the table. The diagrams and blueprints make his head hurt, even though he was the one who designed them.

But every time he thinks of _this_ , in place of his home, with its tiny huts and tents, he gets a weird feeling that he shouldn’t be doing this. 

It is, after all, his home, and seeing it renovated completely is bound to cause some problems. 

Gran-Gran, for one. She’s completely against it, insisting that their tribe shouldn’t become like the modern and filthy North. Sokka doesn’t quite disagree, but even he admits that the South needs a little more modernisation. 

He sighs and gets up, walking across the room and outside. He stares at the various construction projects going on, and can’t help but feel a bit of pride. He’d designed most of these, with the help of architects from the Earth Kingdom. Hakoda had been extremely proud, and honestly, that made up for all the weird feelings he’s been getting. 

He turns towards one of the main buildings — the office for the chief, the one his father would start using once it was built, and walks over to it. Amaruq, the supervisor, is standing in front with his hands behind his back, gazing critically at the building.

“How’s it going, Amaruq?” Sokka asks, coming to a stop beside him. 

“Pretty smoothly,” he answers. “The waterbenders are all extremely skilled and talented, so it’s going to be over soon.”

 _Talented waterbenders_ , Sokka thinks bitterly. _All from the North._

He’s understanding more and more each day why Gran-Gran left the Northern Water Tribe. 

“You know, I didn’t expect the designer of all this architecture to be from the Southern Water Tribe,” Amaruq says, and Sokka stiffens. 

“What is _that_ supposed to mean?” Sokka says, struggling to keep his anger under control. He must not be doing a very good job at it, because Amaruq turns to him guiltily. 

“Nothing bad, of course! We just thought that since the Southern Tribe was so small, it wouldn’t have any… teachers, or tutors.”

“My Gran-Gran is perfectly educated,” Sokka answers, gritting his teeth, “and so are the other women. We don’t treat them like how you treat yours. Are you sure you’re not the one uneducated?”

He knows it’s probably not a good thing to say, but he can’t care less at the moment. He’s had enough of people hating his Tribe, thinking so low of them. They’re _not_ “backwards”, and most definitely not uneducated. 

“Make sure this is done soon,” Sokka says stonily, and turns on his heel, walking away. God. The war’s over and he’s still so tired. 

* * *

Sokka’s looking over the blueprints, again, when he hears a knock at the door. “Come in,” he says, and Hakoda walks in, holding a tray of two steaming mugs. 

“Tea?” he asks, sitting down next to Sokka. 

Sokka nods, accepting a cup.

“How are you?” Hakoda asks.

Sokka shrugs. “I’m okay. But these Northern Water Tribe fancypants won’t be if they don’t _shut their faces_.”

Hakoda makes a grim face and nods, taking a sip from his cup. “They think they’re so much better than us,” he replies. “But please, be nice to them. If you’re gonna be angry at them and yell at them, you’ll just prove the view they have of us.”

Sokka looks down. “But they _shouldn’t_ have that worldview of us,” he says. 

“I know,” Hakoda replies. “But they do, and there’s nothing we can do about it except try to change it.” He gestures towards Sokka’s cup. “Drink up, or it’ll get cold.”

Sokka obliges and quickly finishes his tea. It’s scalding, but he doesn’t mind. It’s helpful in the cold. 

“So,” Hakoda says. “I came here to ask a favour.”

Sokka raises an eyebrow. “What favour?”

“We need a few materials for the main hall,” Hakoda explains. “But it’s not available here. It’s available either in the Fire Nation, or the Earth Kingdom. I know Firelord Zuko would be more than willing to help you out, so I was thinking of asking you to go to him and ask? If you want to, of course. If you don’t, I can send someone else.”

Sokka thinks this over. Going back to the Fire Nation would mean… _getting to see Suki again._

Sokka grins. “Of course I’ll go,” he says, “and you don’t need to call him Firelord Zuko, you know. You can just call him Zuko.”

Hakoda grins sheepishly.

* * *

Sokka can’t stop the smile from spreading across his face as he walks towards the Fire Nation palace, quickening his steps. Zuko had come to receive him, and now they’re both going to meet Suki. 

“Why wasn’t she with you?” Sokka asks. “I thought she was supposed to be your guard?”  
  
“She’s been working too hard,” Zuko says, “so I told her to have a day off.” He looks at Sokka. “She missed you, you know.”

Sokka smiles, looking down. “I missed her too.”

They walk up the steps of the Fire Nation palace, and Zuko leads him towards Suki’s rooms. The palace is exactly as he remembers it; red and gold _everywhere_. Honestly, don’t these people get tired of the same colours over and over?

“Sokka,” Zuko says, stopping him right outside Suki’s door. “Before you go in there… Bato told me to ask you. He’s going to be retiring soon, which means you’re going to need a new Southern Water Tribe ambassador.”

Sokka turns to him in surprise. “Bato’s retiring? Really?”

“Not right now,” Zuko says hurriedly, “but soon. And I’m not sure, but I think the new ambassador he has in mind is probably you.”

Sokka frowns, bewildered. “But I’m busy with rebuilding my home now.”

Zuko sighs frustratedly. “I don’t know, okay? Just ask him.”

Sokka nods, and Zuko walks away, leaving Sokka to talk to Suki. He knocks, and Suki’s voice says, “Come in!”

He enters and finds Suki sitting on her bed, cross-legged. She jumps up as soon as she sees him, surprise on her face. 

“Sokka?” 

Sokka walks over to her and she wraps her arms around him, hugging him tightly. “What are you doing here?” she whispers.

“I came for a visit,” he says, grinning, and she kisses him. 

“That’s pretty nice of you,” she says, eyes bright. “I missed you.”

He buries his face in her shoulder, inhaling her scent. “I missed you too.”

She pulls away and looks at him. “I don’t think you were ever relaxing or taking breaks back home, were you?”

Sokka still doesn’t know how she’s able to read him so well. 

“Well, neither were you,” he says instead. “Zuko literally had to force you to rest.”

“It gives me something to do,” she replies, sitting down and gesturing for him to sit next to her. “If I don’t, I’m just plagued with memories of the war…” 

Sokka puts an arm around her. “I know,” he says softly. “I’m sorry.”

“The others help,” Suki says. “But now you’re here, so at least I can relax a little bit.”

“What, you can’t relax with anyone else?” Sokka asks teasingly.

“I can, actually,” Suki says, smirking. “But you’re kinda special.”

“Just _kinda_? Ouch, Suki. You’re _really_ hurting my feelings here.”

Suki slaps his arm playfully. “Right.”

“No, seriously, what am I gonna do? My girlfriend thinks I’m only _kinda_ special.”

Suki rolls her eyes and laughs, leaning into him. “Alright, _very_ special.”

Sokka grins. “How about we spend the day together? Just the two of us?”

“I’d love that.”

And they do. They spend most of the day touring around the city, eating the spiciest foods they can. 

(“Let’s see who can eat this without crying.”

“Oh, you’re _on_.”)

It’s nice, Sokka realizes. A day with Suki seemed to be exactly what he needed, and he was so very glad he got it. 

* * *

“Sokka, that is a terrible choice for a tea set.”

“No, it isn’t! Iroh would definitely like this!”

“Yeah, well, we aren’t buying this for Iroh, we’re buying this for Katara! That… that _thing_ is just abominable!”

Sokka puts the tea set down dejectedly, because he _knows_ Suki is right. Iroh might love the heavily patterned cups, but Katara’s got a more simplistic style. 

“What about that one?” 

He looks to where Suki is pointing and finds a yellow floral tea set. It does suit Katara’s style. 

“It’s good enough,” he says, “but is it something we can afford?”

Suki looks at the price tag and then turns to Sokka gloomily. She shakes her head.

“Well then,” Sokka says. “Time to look somewhere else.”

They scour the streets, filled with vendors and street stalls and the occasional antique shop, but they still don’t find anything that Katara would like. And, even if they do, it’s way more than their budget can afford. 

Finally, Sokka stops them at a small restaurant and flops down onto a chair. 

“Alright, this isn’t working. Why are we even getting Katara a _tea set_ for her birthday? She doesn’t even drink tea!” 

Suki leans against the wall and fans herself. It’s hot out, not as hot as the Fire Nation, but still, and the restaurant is crowded. Suki’s wearing her heavy warrior clothes, so it can’t be too comfortable for her. 

“She likes the look of it,” Suki replies. “And it’s useful for when guests come over.”

“Man, I can’t imagine being bothered with stuff like that,” Sokka says, yawning. 

Suki smacks his head with her fan. “It’s proper hospitality,” she answers. “You wouldn’t want your guests to think you don’t care for them or something.”

“But I don’t _get_ guests,” he says tiredly. “You and I practically live in the Fire Nation palace now. You’re busy with protecting Zuko and I’m the ambassador…”

Suki doesn’t say anything. Sokka’s got a lot to say, though.

“I mean, don’t you ever get tired of it? Don’t you wanna go back to Kyoshi Island and protect it and have fun there in a way you haven’t been able to before?” He sighs and looks at the bustling crowd outside. “Look at these people. They’re all doing what they want, living the life they want… why can’t that be us?”

“Sokka, Zuko’s my friend. I want to serve as his royal guard.”

“I _know_. I care about him too. But he’s got lots of guards at his beck and call, and… maybe I just wanna be like Katara and Aang.”

He feels rather than hears Suki’s sharp intake of breath because she recognizes the weight of his words. Settle down, have a house, maybe some kids? Although Katara and Aang aren’t quite there yet. (But they’re probably thinking about it.)

“I… I don’t know, Sokka.”

The fear in her voice is palpable.

“It’s okay,” he says quietly. “We probably need more time to think about it. Both of us.”

Suki nods and holds out a hand to help him up. “C’mon, let’s go back to finding something for Katara.”

In the end, they do find something, but the weight of the day’s travels leave them too exhausted to do anything other than crawl into their beds and sleep. And after that, neither of them acknowledges the conversation they’d had. 

* * *

Sokka steps out of the ship, holding Suki’s hand behind him. It’s snowing pretty heavily, even though Sokka chose the best possible time for them to go to the South Pole. It’s the first time Suki will see the place he grew up in, and needless to say, he’s excited.

“It’s _cold_ ,” Suki says, shivering. He puts an arm around her and gently guides her towards the town in the distance. Hakoda will be waiting for them there. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll get you warmed up soon in enough.”

Suki shivers again in reply. They make their way across the snow, with a few escorts behind them. Sokka walks quickly, anxious to get Suki out of the cold. She’s never experienced such cold before.

When they reach the edge of the town, Hakoda and Katara are waiting for them. Katara runs up to him and hugs him, tight, almost suffocating him. 

“Woah, Katara, calm down,” he says, laughing, and she lets go. “Is Aang here?”

“Aang had some business to take care of in Omashu,” she replies, and turns to Suki. “Suki! I’m so glad you’re here!”

She hugs her as well, and Hakoda comes over. 

“We’re glad to have you here, Suki,” he says.

“Well, I’m glad too, but could I please get somewhere warm?” Suki says, teeth chattering. 

“Oh, of course, right. Let’s go.”

Katara leads Suki through the icy streets, while Hakoda walks next to his son. “So, how’re you doing?”

Sokka shrugs. “Eh, we’re alright.”

“I didn’t mean both of you, I meant you.”

Sokka turns to look at Hakoda and finds him smiling down at him warmly. “I’m okay too. It’s been a rough couple of years, but things are smoothing over now.”

Hakoda claps him on the back. “Well, it’s good to have you back, son.”

Sokka flushes as Hakoda puts his arm around his shoulders. It’s been years but he’ll still never get used to this. And, in a way, he doesn’t want to. 

They follow Katara and Suki into Gran-Gran’s hut. It was the only one that wasn’t torn down, thanks to Gran-Gran herself. When they enter, she’s busy knitting.

“Gran-Gran!” Sokka says, and moves to hug her. It really has been too long; he’d forgotten how _good_ Gran-Gran’s hugs felt. 

“So good to see you, Sokka,” she says warmly, and Sokka almost cries. It’s been _so goddamn long_. He missed his family, damn it.

He turns to Suki, who’s sitting as close to the fire as possible, swarmed in blankets. He sits down next to her and gently grabs her hands, caressing them. It was something their mother used to do when they were feeling too cold. She smiles gratefully and leans against his shoulder.

“So what are you going to do to make sure Suki enjoys her stay, Sokka?” Katara asks, sitting down in front of him. 

“Penguin sledding, probably,” he replies. “Suki, you’re going to _love_ it.”

She shivers and looks at him, smiling. “I’d hope so. I didn’t come here just for the cold.”

Hakoda laughs. “Well then, I’ll leave you girls to it. Sokka, take a walk with me?” Without waiting for an answer, he turns around and leaves the hut. Sokka exchanges a look with Katara, who shrugs, and follows after Hakoda.

He finds him a few feet ahead and jogs to catch up to him, settling into a comfortable pace next to him.

“So,” Hakoda says. “How are you and Suki?”

“We’re good,” he says, shrugging. He’s still not sure what this is about.

“So, you’re not thinking of starting a family together?”

Sokka stops walking. This is most definitely _not_ how he’d expected this visit to go. 

“Why… why are you asking me that?”

Hakoda turns to face him and shrugs. “I’m just asking because I want you to be happy. Do what you want.”

Sokka nods. “We are thinking about it,” he answers. “But we’re just deciding to take this slow, you know?” 

Hakoda gives him a smile. “Well, you’d better take her penguin sledding before anything else.”

Sokka beams. “ _Obviously._ ”

* * *

“I do not trust this.”

Suki steps gingerly around the penguins, eyeing them warily. 

“Suki, they’re just _penguins_ ,” Sokka says, grinning. “They can’t hurt you.”

He coos at one and it waddles over to him, eyes curious. Sokka has always loved penguins, ever since he was a kid. He remembers when Hakoda had taken them penguin sledding for the first time — he was five, and Katara three. It was exhilarating. Katara had been too scared to go again, but Sokka spent almost the whole day just sliding around the snow on the backs of penguins. 

“Are you sure they’ll be able to hold our weight?” Suki asks, frowning. 

Sokka shrugs. “They’re pretty strong. ‘Course they will.”

He walks over to her and leads her to the penguin, which is now staring at both of them. “C’mon,” he says, and shows her how to sit down. 

Suki makes rubs a hand across the penguin’s back. “Soft,” she whispers, and Sokka smiles. 

“Yeah. They’re pretty cute, too.”

He gets another penguin and gets into position, smirking over at Suki. 

“Ready?”

Suki nods, face set determinedly, and then, they’re off. 

Suki screams. 

“Do you like it?” Sokka yells, cold wind whipping around him and making his hair fly back, exposing his ears. He should’ve tied his hair up. 

Suki yells something incoherent, but she’s got an excited look on her face, so Sokka knows she likes it. The snow-covered hill they’re going down on isn’t too steep, and they’ll be hitting the bottom any minute now. 

“This is — actually fun!” Suki says loudly, screaming over the wind. 

“I told you!” Sokka replies. “Penguin sledding is _always_ gonna be fun!”

A few moments later, they slow down, arriving at the foot of the hill. Sokka gets off the penguin and bends over, panting. Suki gets up and flops down into the snow. 

“It’s cold,” Sokka says, lying down beside her. The snow doesn’t affect him much, he’s grown up in the South Pole after all, but Suki would definitely be affected by it. 

“Right now there’s fire running through my veins,” Suki says, closing her eyes.

Sokka raises an eyebrow and turns to look at the sky. “Dramatic much?”

Suki nudges him playfully. “Says you.”

Sokka laughs and nudges her back. “So I’m rubbing off on you, huh?”

Suki leans up on one elbow and looks at him. “Yeah, you are,” she says, and kisses him softly. Sokka kisses her back, and then pulls away, frowning. 

“Your lips are cold. We should get back before you catch a cold.”  
  
Suki nods and gets up. “Race you to the top,” she says, and grins, turning around and running back up.

“Hey!” Sokka yells, running after her. “You got a headstart, not fair!”  
  
Suki laughs. 

* * *

Sokka stares as Bumi runs across the courtyard on his little toddler legs, laughing and squealing. Aang runs after him, trying to catch him.

“They’re having fun,” he comments, and Katara smiles.

“Aang is a great dad,” she says softly. “At first, I had my doubts… since Bumi turned out to be a non-bender… but now I realize I shouldn’t have had my doubts. I’m supposed to trust Aang to be a good dad. Just looking at those two… you realize how much he loves his son.”

Sokka turns his gaze thoughtfully over to the pair. Aang has caught Bumi now, and is tickling him on the grass, both of them looking like they’re having the time of their lives.

Watching them, Sokka gets a weird feeling in his stomach, but doesn’t think too much of it. It’s nice watching the kid he considered (and still considers) a younger brother grow up and become a dad. Almost nostalgic, he’d say. 

“Bumi doesn’t get to spend much time with his father.” 

Sokka is drawn out of his thoughts by Katara’s voice. She’s still watching them, a smile on her face, and the most tender look of love Sokka’s ever seen her give anyone.

It’s only then, perhaps, that he realizes he wants it too. 

“Aang’s always busy doing his Avatar thing,” Katara continues, oblivious to Sokka’s mid-day crisis. “He and Bumi don’t get much time together. But when they do… it’s like nothing else exists in the world.”

Sokka nods. He’s not quite sure what to say to that. 

“I’m going to find Suki,” he says hoarsely, and Katara turns to him, smiling knowingly. 

“Last I saw her she was with Ty Lee and Toph,” Katara says, and Sokka turns in the direction he last saw Toph in. 

He sees Ty Lee sitting with Mai and Suki at the edge of the fountain in Zuko’s garden. Ty Lee is chattering happily while Mai and Suki listen on. 

“Hey, ladies,” he calls out, wiggling his eyebrows. Suki smacks him as he sits down next to her. “Where’s Toph?”

“She went to show Izumi something,” Mai drawls out. “Hopefully it’s nothing dangerous.”

“Do you _know_ Toph?” Sokka says, snickering. “My bet is she’s teaching her a new way to commit arson.”

Mai groans. “Oh, I’ve had about enough of that,” she says, and stands up. “Well, see you later, I guess.”

Ty Lee follows behind her, and then it’s just him and Suki. She moves closer and rests her head on his chest, getting comfortable. She’s not wearing her Kyoshi Warrior uniform right now, just some plain Earth Kingdom clothes. She closes her eyes and sighs. 

“This is nice,” she says quietly. “All of us together again. God knows how long it’s been.”

“I know,” he replies. “I missed everyone. I missed you.”

She turns her head to look at him. Over the years, her features have changed the most; her hair is longer and the lines of her face are sharper. 

She leans in and presses a soft kiss against his cheek. “I missed you too.”

He leans back against the fountain and Suki rests against him, both of them happy to just stay quiet and enjoy the afternoon. Sokka places his hands on her head and starts running his fingers through her hair. It’s something he’s learned helps calm her down. She sighs contentedly.

“Hey Suki?” he says, breaking the silence. She hums questioningly in reply. “I was thinking. About. Stuff.”

She peeks up at him. “Okay? What kinda stuff?”

“Well… watching Katara and Aang and Mai and Zuko and even Toph… I realized I kinda want that.”

She sits up, facing him, and stares at him. “What?”

“Y’know, kids. A family. The two of us.”

He gulps and looks away, still not sure he should be asking something like that. They’ve never discussed something like this, mostly because they’ve never had a reason to. Both of them are perfectly happy staying like this and not taking things further — but Sokka knows you can only keep dating for so long. 

“I’m not opposed to it,” Suki says quietly. Sokka jerks his head up, heart pounding. “The thought of starting a family with you… that’s a nice thought. But I guess I’m just… not ready yet.”

“That’s fine,” he reassures quickly. “We don’t have to discuss anything big, really. We can just… wait a while and see where this goes.”

She nods and snuggles back into his chest. “I’m tired, let me sleep.”

(Later, Katara finds them, wrapped around each other under the fountain, and snoring softly. She smiles and orders for a blanket to be delivered to them.)

* * *

Sokka is thirty-three years old when it happens. 

He and Suki had _just_ agreed to start a family together, and were already planning on wedding arrangements. It was the _happiest_ Sokka had ever been, and just when everything felt perfect and happy, it shattered.

He stares down at Suki’s body in the healers’ hut, numb and cold. He still doesn’t fully process it. That’s not Suki. _That’s not Suki_. He hears Katara sob behind him, he hears Kya bawling, and he hears Toph’s sniffles, but for the life of him, no sound can escape him at all. 

_And just when we were both happy. Just when we’d both figured out our lives together_.

He reaches out a hand and gently touches Suki’s. They’re cold, so cold, colder than any human hand ought to be. And that, perhaps, is the breaking point, because a sob rips out from him and he drops to his knees beside Suki, curling into himself. Katara moves forward quickly and wraps her arms around him, tears streaming down her face. 

_This wasn’t supposed to happen. I should’ve been there. I should’ve protected her_. 

Katara rubs her hand across his back soothingly but it doesn’t help; _nothing_ will help. The only way everything will turn out _okay_ is if he sees Suki, in front of him, alive and breathing and okay. But the body on the table doesn’t magically come to life. He never wakes up from what he hopes is a nightmare, because it isn’t. 

Suki is well, and truly, gone. 

* * *

“How are you doing?”

Sokka turns at the sound of Katara’s voice, and shrugs. “Okay.”

Katara sits down next to him. “You’re not. It’s okay, Sokka —”

“It’s _not!_ ” Sokka yells, interrupting her. “Stop telling me it’s okay, because it’s _not_.”

Katara looks away, her lip trembling. “I — I know,” she says, and Sokka can hear the sob in her voice. 

“I know it’s — it’s not okay. B — but you’ve — you’ve been so down, and — and I wanted to cheer you up—”

Sokka doesn’t think; he moves and wraps Katara around him. Because while he’s been hurting, Suki is — no, _was_ — Katara’s friend too. He isn’t the only one that’s hurting. 

They sit like that for most of the day, holding on to each other. 

Sokka doesn’t know when he’ll ever be okay. 

**Author's Note:**

> okay i'm sorry for putting you through that,,,, also, exactly _how_ suki died, you can guess:))
> 
> anyway, here's my [tumblr](https://acekatara.tumblr.com) if you ever wanna talk!


End file.
